So, apparantly a lot of people lie about the books they read, at least according to a survey in Britain. At first I was all judgmental and then I remembered that I did it myself in high school to impress a cute boy. (Wasted effort by the way--he didn't really give a crap about books so much as boobs.) So just for fun and in the interest of full disclosure, I am copying the top-ten lied about books here and will reveal whether I've actually read them. (Ooh, you say sarcastically, you're so excited--too that I say, "Shoosh. Be nice.")
1. The Lord of the Rings – J.R.R Tolkien
Well, I skimmed it. I have read The Hobbit a couple of times, but I have never, and believe me, I've tried, been able to read LotR all the way through without falling asleep. So I read the interesting parts and skimmed the dull. I'd say that pretty much counts as a not-read.
2. War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
I've never even tried.
3. Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
I've read it a few times. Heathcliff is not my favorite romantic hero. He's kind of whiny.
4. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus – John Gray
Not read. My ex-husband did actually buy it for me while we were still married. He was into self-help books and really wanted me to be into them too. I wasn't. Perhaps this might partially explain why I'm his ex.
5. 1984 – George Orwell
Read it in high school with the kind of focus I can now demonstrate by telling you I don't remember anything other than the basic plot.
6. Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone – J.K Rowling
Read it many, many, many times.
7. Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
Haven't read it. Another one I started and put down midway through.
8. Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
I've read it probably 3 or 4 times.
9. The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
I've read it and I feel a compelling need to add that it's FICTION and that's why it lives in the FICTION section of the bookstore.
10. Diary of Anne Frank – Anne Frank
I've read it a few times. I love it--how can you not love Anne, with her hopes and her dreams that wouldn't die?
So, there you have it. I guess I'm not as well-read as I thought I was. The valuable lesson to be learned is--don't lie, because someone who really has read it will start asking you questions about it and then you'll look stupid. And that would suck.
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5 comments:
Well, I've read about 2/3's of LOTR, but I must confess that I could only read each part of the book after seeing the movie. And after I got 2/3's of the way through, I pretty much said, "Screw this," so I can't claim to have read it.
I read the first 4 or 5 pages of War and Peace, and never picked it back up again.
Other than that, I have read all the others on your list at least once, and some many, many more times.
Out of curiosity, why would one lie about reading Men Are From Mars? It's such an idiotic book? I'd be much more likely to lie about reading The Satanic Verses (which I haven't finished and may never finish) or something that I perceive to be pretentious.
But that's just me.
I hear you!! I was surprised anyone would lie about that one. But it was quite the sensation when it first came out and everyone was talking about it. So maybe it's that same concept of wanting to join in the conversation enough to lie about it.
I've read 1, 5 & 10. Not too bad, huh?
:-)
(By the way, when I was a wee lad I used to say I was from Venus, so what does that guy know?)
I have read them all but War and Peace. My favorite being LOTR and I have read it many, many times. I am also a huge fan of 1984. I have made every man that claims their undying love for me read 1984 too.
Sam, it's okay, you can be from Venus if you want to!!
SpinDoc, I think it's awesome that you have required reading for your potential love interests. I think I should emulate you.
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